Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
being pregnant is like rehab
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
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