chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize