Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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