Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
We are two peas in an std pod
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize
