can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
no, he came in my armpit
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
