your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
tell me about the eggs
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
