am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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