I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Randomize
