We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize