first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
are you so shy because you have an std?
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
