I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Randomize
