I love black thongs
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
