That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
