aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
