I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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