No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
