There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
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