Where is the hickey?
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Randomize
