Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize