I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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