One girl and one boy is just not enough.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I just forgot I was standing up.
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