So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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