i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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