New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Randomize