Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
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