another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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