how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
