And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
