Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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