what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Boobs are out for the taking
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
