Swine flu. Run for my life!
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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