Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
