we're blogging at a bar
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
