brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
