The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
She's not a foreskin expert like you
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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