Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Randomize