It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize