craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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