I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
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