is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize