Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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