well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Randomize
