I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
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