You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
