you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
