My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
It was confusing and full of hummus
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
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