She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Randomize
