Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize