TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
