is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Randomize
